“Don’t Go Away Mad, Just Go Away”
This saying was popular when I was a kid, and it used to puzzle me, until I learned about introverts.
Introverts and extroverts are each a people-group, with great differences.
Introverts like their own company better than anyone else’s.
Solitude is an enjoyable place for them, yet not all quiet people become school shooters.
You probably know an introvert, and that person may puzzle you.
Here are some secrets to understanding introverts:
1) They need very little attention, and aren’t always grateful for the interest you show them.
The interaction they have with biological family, employers, customers, or teachers, is often more than they want.
2) They generally don’t dislike all people, though they usually dislike crowds. They prefer solitude.
There is a difference between not liking a person and preferring solitude.
3) Quiet thinking is nearly impossible in group situations. Quiet thinking is important to introverts, and isolation is
necessary for an introvert's free-range thought. Barton was an introvert, and so were many people who invent
helpful devices and medicines. Some people solve problems by plagiarizing other peoples' brains in a group setting,
but introverts solve problems with their own brains, and reading books to pick the brains of other introverts who
have written about their findings.
4) Introverts are the opposites of extroverts, like entertainers, cult leaders and attention adddicts, who need others to
listen to them endlessly and give never-ending affirmation. Introverts just don’t need it.
5) An introvert might like you, but not need your company.
That can be hard to understand, and an introvert might seem unfriendly, but that’s the way some people are.
When they are friends, they are quiet friends.
Introverts have a useful place in this world, but don’t expect to see them wearing party hats.
Two more thoughts:
1) There is a ‘vert’ halfway in-between, called an ‘ambivert’. This is what I am. I can go to a party and enjoy myself
for an hour or two, talking to many people. Then I disappear, go home and lock the door.
2) With the tussle over vaccines and masks, I suspect introverts are the most likely to enjoy wearing masks,
engage in self-isolation, and welcome lockdowns.
The Bullying of Introverts
I suspect introverts are more likely to be bullied than extroverts. Extroverts, especially attention-addicts, are the most like to do the bullying. People who deeply-need positive attention, will actually demand attention from others.
When an introvert won't give an extroverted attention-addict the attention they crave, they can become bullies or gossips, hating the introverts that won't 'worship' them. This is a hard truth for middle-graders, but this is something you need to know..
Eric J. Rose